Lenny Distilled

How to build deeper, more robust relationships

April 25, 2024

Featuring: Carole Robin (Former Stanford Professor, Founder of Leaders in Tech)

4 quotes · 4 insights

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Focus on being liked or driving performance?

People do business with people not ideas, not products, not machines, not tactics, strategies, not even money, they do business with people. So you better get the people part right if you really want to succeed.
Carole RobinFormer Stanford Professor, Founder of Leaders in Tech 00:08:23

Vulnerability unlocks deeper customer insights

This advice applies to giving feedback without making people defensive, as discussed in their conversation about interpersonal communication.

Questions that start with what, when, where, how. Stay away from why.
Carole RobinFormer Stanford Professor, Founder of Leaders in Tech 00:00:22

Vulnerability and authenticity build stronger influence than authority

I actually think that a leader who is willing to be appropriately vulnerable is a stronger leader.
Carole RobinFormer Stanford Professor, Founder of Leaders in Tech 00:27:15

Address small conflicts before they become catastrophic

"It" refers to addressing small interpersonal irritations (called "pinches") before they escalate into major conflicts ("crunches").

Talk about a pinch before it becomes a crunch, and then it becomes a much bigger deal. But most of the time we say it's not worth it. So I always tell students, okay, substitute the pronoun, substitute the word it for I, you, we. I'm not worth it, you're not worth it. We're not worth it.
Carole RobinFormer Stanford Professor, Founder of Leaders in Tech 00:42:04

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